The Name of Jesus

A right reminder amid fitful nights

It has been a pretty stressful few months for me. I don’t need to get into all of the particulars, but there has been a lot going on. Exhausting days followed by fitful nights followed by more exhausting days followed by more fitful nights.

The Puritan prayers within The Valley of Vision have been a faithful companion in this season, and they have buoyed my heart when it has been tempted to sink. I shared one with you a few weeks ago as we approached Easter weekend. Today I’d like to share another with you. This one is called “The Name of Jesus.” I’ve bolded the parts that particularly move me.

All-searching God,

Thou readest the heart,
viewest principles and motives of actions,
seest more defilement in my duties
than I ever saw in any of my sins.
The heavens are not clean in thy sight,
and thous chargest the angels with folly;
I am ready to flee from myself because of my abominations;
Yet thou dost not abhor me
but hast devised means for my return to thee,
and that, by thy Son who died to give me life.

Thine honour is secured and displayed even in
my escape from thy threats,
and that, by means of Jesus
in whom mercy and truth meet together,
and righteousness and peace kiss each other.

In him the enslaved find redemption,
the guilty pardon,
the unholy renovation;
In him are everlasting strength for the weak,
unsearchable riches for the needy,
treasures of wisdom and knowledge for the ignorant,
fullness for the empty.
At thy gracious call I hear, take, come, apply,
receive his grace,
not only submit to his mercy but acquiesce in it,
not only glory in the cross but in him crucified
and slain,
not only joy in forgiveness but in the one
through whom atonement comes.

Thy blessings are as secure as they are glorious;
Thou hast provided for my safety and my prosperity,
and hast promised that I shall stand firm and
grow stronger.
O Lord God, without the pardon of my sin I cannot
rest satisfied
without the renovation of my nature by grace
I can never rest easy,
without the hopes of heaven I can never be
at peace.
All this I have in thy Son Jesus; blessed be
his name.

It’s so easy, at least for me, in times of vulnerability to become hyper aware of my own inadequacies and faults, even if the vulnerability I’m feeling has nothing to do with my own brokenness and sin.

It’s like the vulnerability acts as an amplifier, increasing the volume of my self-doubt from its ever-present low murmur to something quite louder.

And yet, when I am ready, even desperate, to flee from myself because of my brokenness, God doesn’t leave. In fact, he’s already executed his plan to draw me closer to himself.

Indeed, these blessings are as secure as they are glorious. It’s in times like these when I am so grateful to be reminded that I cannot lose what I have not earned.

God draws near to me when from myself I’d like to flee.

In Christ God runs to me like the prodigal father runs to his wayward son, even when my waywardness looks more like sadness and stress than parties and pleasures. Because I have the hopes of heaven, I can be at peace.